Sunday, November 16, 2008

Expat Hell

I know I haven't been posting much and when I do it's a stretch to find something nice to say. I guess I've gotten past that euphoric stage where all is right with the Egyptian world and have to now start dealing with the everyday reality of all that is Egypt. If I had to sum it all up in one sentence, right now I'd say "Just point me towards the exit"!!! Yeh!

A friend of mine who's been here for nearly 20 years says the first year is the hardest. She's right and I should know that cuz I've had two first years here before this and am now working on my third "first year"--are you still with me? One day you wake up and look around and say "Where the hell am I and why did I do this to myself?" I guess that's where I am right now. Truly wishing I could turn tail and run back home to the USA. I miss my kids and right now I am sorry to say--all things American. When it hurts so bad I let myself run with the idea of actually going back and the logistics of it just seem to much to handle. First there's the issue of where I will stay in USA--sure, there's the kids but who wants Mom and Grandma hanging around forever--not them! So it means the inevitable and ever painful apartment search--something I can actually afford and will allow this moose of a dog I have. Then it needs to be furnished, which on the flip side--what do I do with all my stuff here??? Even though for now it's a furnished flat, you cant imagine the crap you manage to accumulate in the attempt to make it a little bit your own. Ah well...same crap different country.

What happens to an expat in the love/hate relationship of the adoptive country? I mean why go from loving a place to hating a place almost overnight? I guess it's like any other relationship. The honeymoon period slowly ends and real life sets in and you are forced to face the truth that your beloved is not perfect. For a time you only focus on the warts. And it's a scary thing. I know beyond this point is a happy medium where you begin to focus on the accurate picture--that everything and everyone has their faults as well as their good points. And it's at this point you need to ask yourself, does the good outweigh the bad?

I'll let you know when I get there. Meantime stay tuned for some reasons why I'm no longer thrilled with life in this sandbox.

5 comments:

Susan said...

This is all par for course when it comes to culture shock. Love, then hate, then acceptance. People who spend 2 years or 20 in Egypt manage to do so by putting up the walls of tolerance. Just check out those who leave after years there: they start to hate EVERYTHING.

Colleen said...

Oh I know how you feel. Give it more time. I know it took me a good year before I felt settled.

Please IM me whenever you can. I miss our chats!!!

Love ya!!

on the edge said...

I have had 3 first years here in Libya and I always said there NEVER would be more than just 1 , lol ! OK!You know the drill ... Dorthy you aren't in Kansas anymore so quit thinking like you are still there #1 . #2 ... Don't go home NO MATTER HOW HOMESICK YOU GET!!!!!!That just aggravates the situation and makes you very dissatisfied with your very different life you have now .#3.... Just accept this is the way things are and go with the flow OR else be miserable .You are living in a 3rd world country and it will never be America .#4....Try to make your life happy by making new friends that are good for you .#5... Be your self and true to yourself .Don't try to be who you aren't and what you dislike .And that's all my free advise to you , lol . It does get better , really ! Hanging there sister !xoxoxoxox's !

photo flip books said...

nice to read your blog.

Flipbook Event said...

Nice thanks for sharing.Keep posting such wonderful thoughts or experience?